I'm writing this more for me then for my friend, whose mother in law is in the hospital with liver complications. My friend and her husband are sitting vigil. I feel helpless- not much that can be done, just the usual "I'm here" sentiments. I'm a definite " I will fix this, take care of this, no worries", but not with this circumstance. I can only stand by the door until needed.
Why is that we die in silence? Silence in the room, everyone speaking in hushed tones, careful movements and I have never understood why. I think the last moments should be filled with stories, laughing, crying, telling the dying person what you should have said long ago. They may not be conscious - say it anyway, they can hear you and feel you.
I once sat with a friend as she was dying from cancer that had ended up in her liver, she was in and out of consciousness. I sat and told stories and shared memories with her, sometimes crying myself. I told one special story that was just between her and I, and after I finished with tears in my eyes, my dear friend let out a laugh/giggle. I knew she knew I was there. She passed about an hour later. I felt like I had done my best in making her last moments full of love and caring.
Now I will sit and wait till I am needed. Sitting vigil.
Love your dogs and people,
tk
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