Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Sitting Vigil

I'm writing this more for me then for my friend, whose mother in law is in the hospital with liver complications. My friend and her husband are sitting vigil.  I feel helpless- not much that can be done, just the usual "I'm here" sentiments.  I'm a definite " I will fix this, take care of this, no worries", but not with this circumstance.  I can only stand by the door until needed.

Why is that we die in silence? Silence in the room, everyone speaking in hushed tones, careful movements and I have never understood why.  I think the last moments should be filled with stories, laughing, crying, telling the dying person what you should have said long ago.  They may not be conscious - say it anyway, they can hear you and feel you.
I once sat with a friend as she was dying from cancer that had ended up in her liver, she was in and out of consciousness.  I sat and told stories and shared memories with her, sometimes crying myself.  I told one special story that was just between her and I, and after I finished with tears in my eyes, my dear friend let out a laugh/giggle.  I knew she knew I was there.  She passed about an hour later.  I felt like I had done my best in making her last moments full of love and caring.

Now I will sit and wait till I am needed. Sitting vigil.
Love your dogs and people,

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