Thursday, August 25, 2011

Thought I would post a poem or two of mine. Never sure if anyone actually reads my blog but here goes:

If you had known me when I was younger
Saw the light in my eye,
Walked with me on the beach,
skipped a rock 5 times
maybe you would love me now.

If you had sat on the porch
Watched a firefly drift to the pine top
Accepted the warmth of the dark night
Moved close to hear the quiet
Maybe you would love me now.

If you had tried to hold what remained, the skeleton of a prior me
Watched the lifeblood drain away
Felt the barricades being erected
Bloodied your knuckles in attempted demolition
Maybe you would love me now.

Maybe the confusion over visible behavior
Stubborn masking fear,
Fear guarding abandonment
Would be clearer, would make sense
If you knew me when I was younger.

If you knew me when I was younger,
When the present fear was replaced by trust.
When my soul was forgiving,
With regular childhood scars,
Would you have loved me?

If you had loved me when I was younger,
will you love me now?
tk 2005

Friday, August 19, 2011

Not Like I Used to Be....

I used to recover quite quick, knee replacements- back at work in 10 days, rotator cuff surgeries back at work - 2 weeks. Numerous scope surgeries on my knees, always quick back. I had surgery on my right ankle- tendon/ligament repair and an osteotomy of my heel (cut it through and moved it over) on June 21st. First 6 weeks a cast and no weight bearing, second 6 weeks a boot with partial,increasing weight til Sept. 12. This surgery has kicked me in the ass! Pain from surgery has been minimal, the exhaustion and just plain bone tired has been extreme. I have gone to work 2-3 days a week then need 3 days to recover. I guess at 56 I expect to recover like I did in my 30's and 40's.

So what I have learned is to slow down, (like I have been telling my pre med students for years), enjoy each day.
And mostly enjoy my dogs- let them lay with me, pet them til they sigh and snuggle in for a nap. I have worked from home but not like I used to, I have kept up with my work but it hasn't been my priority.

I hope I can keep it going- I like this part of me.